Tour Quotes, March 2002 (rated PG-13)

(I guess you had to be there.)

"The last time I was sober I got married. I've been drinking ever since " - Overheard spoken by man on the street.

"I've made more money from them than God knows Christmas" - Susan's way of plugging Pro-Player.net.

"I won't have to live with myself for long "

"Life's too short" (overheard by women near Tom Grainey's bathroom).... "Mine's not" (the response by man peeing next to Dave in men's room)

"Three words"... "Children of the Corn" - Never play charades while drinking tequila in public.

"There aren't many jarring words left in the English language, which reminds me of a story."

"You'd better stop that, love, or I'm going to pole-vault out the window" - Luke, as a warning to Susan's manual admiration of his fancy leather pants.

"Another day, another dollar... fifty" Susan describing life on the road.

"I'll bet you haven't moved that fast for a box in a long time" Susan always manages to hit it off real well with gay men.

"My arm fell asleep"..."It's a good time for The Stranger!"

"I thought Susan was getting us a deal, but she was just talking to a dwarf" Dave wondering what Susan was bending over for.

"You're a superhero aren't you?" Susan guessing at a man's occupation.

"You wouldn't like me when I'm nervous."